- The Growth Guide
- A Rock in Your Shoe, a Bear on the Trail and F*ck the Shoulds!
A Rock in Your Shoe, a Bear on the Trail and F*ck the Shoulds!
Welcome to the Growth Guide, a weekly newsletter where I share actionable ideas to help you Live Better, Achieve More and Be Financially Free.
This week on the Growth Guide Podcast we talked to Tricia Huffman, author of F the Shoulds, Do the Wants: Get Clear on Who You Are, What You Want, and Why You Want It.
Forget what you have been told you should do or should be.
Instead, ask yourself, What do I WANT?
In F the Shoulds, Do the Wants, Tricia takes you on her journey of uncovering the impact of the word should and helps you gain the self-awareness that the simple, yet effective one-word swap to the word would gave her.
By shifting shoulds into wants, you will learn to:
Believe in yourself
Doubt your doubts
Live in the moment
Live your life your way
Forgive and let go to free yourself
Use fear as an asymmetrical opportunity
Choose and control your emotions and reactions
Reframe your existence from ‘victim’ to ‘responsibility’
Click below to listen to the episode:
I love to write from lived experience.
And, if it’s a recent lived experience, all the better.
This past week, I went for a 60 minute walk along the river with my son, niece, sister and our two dogs in the HEAT and it resulted in two lessons I wanted to share with you today:
The Rock in Your Shoe
The Bear on the Trail
The Rock in Your Shoe
When you’re attempting to walk longer distances each day, consistency begins to matter, and keeping your body in shape becomes important.
As an example, I played a best of 7 pickleball series with my oldest son, which went a full seven games and it left me exhausted the next day, which meant I didn’t go for a walk.
Back to the trail walk with my family, though, and the rock in my shoe.
Early in the walk, I felt a rock in my shoe.
In the past, I may have ignored the rock for too long.
I’d have ignored the rock long enough for it to become a blister.
A blister has the potential to make it so it would be uncomfortable to walk the next day.
The more I walk, the less I let rocks be.
Instead, as soon as I feel them, I stop the walk.
I bend over, take my shoe off and shake out the rocks.
It takes, at most, 30 seconds and it means I don’t get a blister.
As I bent over to let the rock out of my shoe, I thought about you, the readers.
I started to ask myself as I walked with my family, where are there rocks in your shoes?
Now hear me out.
Take a step back and think.
Where in your life are you letting something go that’s haunting you?
What conversations with friends, family or colleagues are you putting off that could benefit your life?
How could you improve your life if you simply bent over and took the rock out of your shoe?
Take stock of your life
Understand what barriers there are
Understand what you can remove easily
Take a moment to take the rocks out of your shoes
The Bear on the Trail
This was a fun walk.
We were having a good conversation.
It was an out-and-back along the river and was almost done.
My sister and I were talking with my niece while the dogs wandered off-leash and my son strolled on ahead.
That is, until my niece said is that a bear in front of us?
Holy SH*T, it was a bear in front of us on the trail about 20 to 30 feet ahead.
Even worse, it was a bear in between me and my 15-year-old son walking in his direction.
My first concern, always, as a parent, is my kids, so I immediately told my sister and niece to stop moving and screamed for my son but he couldn’t hear me. His airpods were in.
Knowing he was listening to music, I phoned him immediately and he answered, what’s up, Dad?
Turn around, Son, I told him, there’s a bear 30 to 40 feet behind you. Don’t panic. Walk or run to the car as fast as you can.
The distances could be off, I’m not 100% certain.
All I know is I wanted him back to the car as quickly as possible.
He made it to the car and let me know he was okay and we saw the bear wander back into the woods.
After the obligatory joke with my sister and niece, I made sure we had the dogs leashed up and stayed together moving down the trail slowly to stay safe while scouting around us.
We heard one deep growl come at us from the woods and it was enough for us to speed up our walking back to the car for a quick trip home.
Nothing like a bear on the trail to bring some perspective to life.
Some lessons that jumped out at me:
Family Comes First
Focus on the present moment
Pay attention to your surroundings
Be prepared for the unexpected in life
If you’re walking in the forest, ditch the airpods
It was a scary moment.
Even if nothing bad happened.
It’s the moments that make us appreciate what we have.
It’s the moments that make us realize what we’re sleeping on.
It shouldn’t take a bear on the trail to make me realize how important my family is to me.
If a bear walked in your path today, what would you feel?
What current priorities would you realize don’t matter?
What would you prioritize instead?
Don’t wait for the bear.
If you write a newsletter.
Or you want to learn how people grow their newsletter.
You need to read Growth in Reverse by my friend Chenell Basilio.
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